It's Friday, so I won't get started on how I hate Marriot. I know everyone is in a good mood because it's the weekend, so I will save you from my distaste, and let you bask in the radiance that is the end of the week. Anyway, I'm trying to keep the faith that the problem will be solved and something good will come out of the situation.
I thought, in celebration of the weekend (although every day is Saturday to me because I worketh not), I would make some lists.
Lists are cool, right? Lists are really important. We make lists everyday, whether we realize it or not. We subconsciously have a mental list of everything we do, like wake up, lay in bed for an hour, get out of bed, go to the bathroom, make breakfast, take a shower, watch reruns of Glee on Netflix. Just a random example. Our entire life is actually one big long list. So, to honor the list lovers out there, here are a few lists that I made. In keeping with the glory of the weekend, I have kept these lists positive and or humorous in nature. If you want some negative list-making, try fraudulently charging my bank account. That's number one on the list entitled, "Ways to Make Kem Go Arkansas On Someone."
List number one:
"Things I Like to See in the Mall"
1. Old people in really nice tennis shoes walking faster than I'd walked in a week.
2. Escalators. Because who doesn't like escalators?
3. Money on the ground.
4. Food samples.
5. Headless mannequins. (I imagine them to be my arch enemies. Such as Marriot. Ok, last Marriot reference, I promise.)
6. Naked headless mannequins. Because it's better when your arch enemy is naked....Or not so much. Who knows. Scratch number six.
7. Crying kids on Santa, or the Easter Bunny, or any other human dressed as an imaginary cultural figure.
8. Candle stores. Ladies, have you ever tortured your husband by taking him into a candle store and making him smell every single candle on the shelves? Try it.
9. No video game stores. Because this has the same effect on me as number eight on Derick.
10. Kids getting spanked. Sorry all you "discipline with kindness" peeps out there, but I was raised to act civilized in public, and if that didn't happen, my butt was grass (just doesn't have the same effect, huh?) My whole family was raised that way. Just ask my niece Krista how many times she was taken outside the doors at church? Too many to count. Sure, spanking can go too far, as can anything. But it makes me proud that there are still parents out there in today's society who aren't afraid to bust a butt when needed. My butt was busted, my husbands butt was busted, and so were my siblings' (many more times than mine because I was the angel). We all turned out pretty good, right? Don't answer that. Long live corporal punishment!
List number two:
"Things I Don't Like to See in the Mall"
1. Video game stores.
2. Teenagers kissing
3. Anyone kissing
4. Those people who pressure you into a corner with flat irons. I was on the phone once and walked by one. They had the nerve to step in front of me and ask me really loudly if I straighten my hair. Um, on a really really good day my hair gets brushed, and I'm on the phone!
5. Someone playing their ringtones or any other sort of music on their phone. Have you dealt with that? Have you been the d.j. in a similar instance? Well, I'm evacuating the dancefloor.
6. Mark-ups. You know, you got to a store that has huge SALE signs everywhere, only to find out that they had marked the price up from it's original price, then put it on sale, causing you to pay the same or more for a shirt that you could have bought for $5 the week before. Don't fall for it!
7. Anyone in a belly shirt.
8. Elbowers. You know those people that throw bows and speed walk through a crowd only to go directly to a bench and sit down.
9. Converse boots. You know....
Ugly!!!!
10. Segways. Because I'm not allowed to drive them.
List number three:
"Food Combos that You Wouldn't Think Would Work, but Really Do"
1. Ketchup and white rice. Adapted from my mom's personal creation that she ate constantly when I was a bun in the oven: white rice and tomatoes.
2. Chocolate-vanilla root beer at Sonic. (Metcalf, if you're reading this, try it!)
3. Mustard on fried bread. A favorite that I copied from my bro when I was little. Derick likes it, too!
4. Ham, egg and cheese [any sort of biscuit/bread] with pickles. Actually anything is better with a pickle.
5. Italian salad dressing on cold spaghetti noodles. My easiest pasta salad recipe, and one of the best!
6. Ranch dressing on school lunchroom pizza. (Shoutout to BHS alumni and current students!)
7. Mashed potatoes with any other side dish mixed in.
8. Raw potato peel with salt. Or just a raw potato with salt. Actually any sort of raw fruit or vegetable with salt. Lemon, grapefruit, peach, nectarine, carrot, kiwi. Even ice with salt is yum, and it can also alleviate a sore throat. My dad taught me to lick my hand, salt it, then lick the salt off. Kinda like taking a shot of tequila, as I was recently told.
9. Pancakes with Hershey's chocolate syrup. A very popular breakfast growing up.
10. Frozen grapes in any sort of fruit juice or lemonade. Cool and fun for the summer!
List number four:
"Food Combos that Don't Work"
1. Jello and salt.
List number five:
"People With One Name who I Wouldn't Mind Meeting and a One-Word Explanation as to Why"
1. Bono: Genius.
2. Elvis: Dead
3. Cher: Sonny
4. Lassie: Dog
5. Madonna: Vogue
6. Oprah: Rich
7. P!nk: Crazy
8. Prince: Questionable
9. Shakira: Hips
10. Fabio: Horse
List number six:
"Funny Gift Ideas to Give to an Overly-Serious Person"
1. A huge birdbath. Just thought that'd be funny to give to anyone.
2. A punchbowl with boxing gloves in it.
3. Tickets to that redneck comedy tour. Was it "Blue Collar Comedy?"
4. A chihuahua.
5. A smart car.
6. That drink from the 90s called Orbitz, with the little squishy balls floating around inside.
7. Antoine Dodson. (The hide yo kids guy).
8. A trophy for "Best Sense of Humor"
9. A child.
10. A child with squeak shoes.
List number seven and last one of the day:
"Embarrassing Moments from my Past"
1. First day of seventh grade when I slipped in the water on the floor in front of the water fountain, and Ace Mizell said, "Have a nice trip, Kem?" and I yelled, "SHUT UP, ACE!!!"
2. When I peed my pants in the hallway from laughing so hard in Mr. May's math class. I was, of course, being sent to the office.
3. When I was little, my mom, sister, and I were shopping in Kroger, and I thought blind people really could see, they just weren't trying. I thought that if I were blind, I could make myself see, so I closed my eyes and walked through the meat section. I peeped my eyes open just the teeniest tiniest bit, just enough to see my Mom by her buggy. Eyes still closed, I got on the end of the buggy (the way kids ride, standing on the rail between the wheels, holding on the the basket.) I opened my eyes to see a strange lady. I quickly jumped off, and ran to find my family. My sister teased me about it all the way to the check-out counter, "Kem jumped on the wrong buggy! Kem jumped on the wrong buggy." I finally yelled at my sister, "THE WOMAN SAID IT WAS OK!!!!"
4. When I peed my pants playing quiz bowl.
5. When I peed my pants at the fair and blamed it on nonexistent boys who sprayed me in the pants with a water bottle.
Note: To some it may seem that I had a really terrible bladder issue. Not the case. I just laughed a lot.
6. When I was sick with fever and wet the bed during our first week of marriage.
7. My senior year when I was competing with my all-star cheer squad and I had just finished a tumble pass. We were being filmed with weird cameras on long poles that swooped back and forth over the floor. After I finished the pass, snot flew violently out of my nose and into the direction of a nearby camera. I quickly wiped my nose and in the same motion, threw up the number one! I prayed the people watching just assumed the snot was body glitter.
8. When Derick and my friend, Brittney, and I went to a concert at the 501 Club in Jonesboro to see one of our favorite bands, Flores. There were tables and chairs scattered around, and I sat down and fell completely through the seat of the chair. The band later came on and asked if any one had ever had a bad day, and I raised my hand and told them what had just happened. They asked my name, and sang a song to incorporate my name. Hint: use your embarrassing moments to get serenaded!:)
9. In Kindergarten, when our grade published a cookbook and were told to bring recipes our parents made. I didn't ask my Mom to give me a recipe. Instead, I just went up to Mrs. Davis and told her Mom's recipe myself. It was called, "Chocolate Eggs," and you crack the eggs, heat them up and mix them with chocolate. Mrs. Davis asked if that was something I ate often, and I said that my mom cooked it for me all the time. They published my recipe with a goofy illustration of an egg in a spoon, smiling as "chocolate sauce" is dripping off of him.
10. In fourth grade, when I brought a can of Fresca to school, and Darius Frazier told everyone I had beer in my backpack.
Everyone enjoy the weekend! Add don't forget to salt your food!*
Way back in the good ole days of TBS, Derick and his platoon decided to spend SPC day at Busch Gardens in Williamsburg, VA. They stayed in Springhill Suites by Marriot, and Derick, being the platoon treasurer, paid for eight rooms on our credit card. We are high rollers. Actually, no. Of course the platoon paid Derick back.
So, two nights ago, Derick checks the bank account to find that $102 and some change was deducted from Springhill Suites and after further investigation, he realized it was the same hotel the platoon stayed in during the one fun day of TBS. He told me to remind him to check the account the next day because maybe that was just a glitch in the system.
Of course, the problem wasn't resolved. The problem is NEVER resolved. So Derick called our bank last night to see what we needed to do. Our bank, USAA, is really great. They are more than helpful in any situation, and they are always extremely polite. They love their service members! Last night, Springhill Suites and Marriot only showed disrespect and stupidity.
Firstly, let me say that, once again, I'm not trying to be a complainer, but these issues seem to attach themselves to me. I hate dealing with money, numbers, business, phone tact, thus, I studied English. However, I feel like people who do actually work in an environment that pulsates because of money and customer service should have some sort of understanding about how to a.) solve problems that they made and b.) speak to people in a polite manner.
Next, let me say that we have been in North Carolina for a month. That means, we haven't been to Virginia in a month. Which also means we weren't there this weekend. Just making sure everyone understands the issue at hand.
Back to my complaining.
Derick called the hotel and spoke with a receptionist, who was completely clueless. (Hey Bitsy, if you need a job, I'm sure you could work at Springhill Suites!) Ok, that was rude and childish. But this girl didn't have any idea how to look up any sort of information that dealt with this problem. She said, "Ok, well it doesn't look like you have made a reservation."
NO DUH!
She went on to say that she would have someone who could help call us within the hour. When Derick asked for the number to a corporate office, she "didn't know" and "couldn't find it." Laughable.
When that promised call surprisingly never came, Derick called back and the same receptionist answered and transferred him to said "helpful" person, who said she'd never heard of us or our issue, nor did she know how to address it. The receptionist transferred him to another hotel, under the same management, where the call went straight to voicemail.
Fed up, Derick googled "Springhill Suites Marriot" and magically found the number for corporate customer service, who transferred him for about an hour, hung up on him, questioned his integrity, and pretty much told him he was SOL.
THESE PEOPLE STOLE OUR MONEY!!! Am I the only one seeing something wrong with taking money out of an account without authorization, not to mention being given the run around and treated as if it isn't a problem at all!?
Derick finally spoke with someone who seemed to have passed the fifth grade, but she couldn't help. She said he would have to call the actual hotel between 8-5, during which time Derick WORKS! She asked why I couldn't call.
They really did not want me to call. Really.
BUT, I did. I called this morning at 10, and spoke with someone who put on a really good act, but frankly knew nothing. She told me that "it seems that the money was rebated to us on June 30 by *Melissa*." (*Names have been changed to protect the MORONS*).
Ok, rebated?? Do you mean refunded? Also, who is Melissa? She spoke of Melissa as if we were BFFs. I hung up, praying that she was correct in that our money was rebated. Or refunded. Or redistributed. Or repaved. Repainted. You get the pic.
After thinking a little bit, which is a really good idea for the people I've been dealing with, I began to wonder how our money was rebated back on the 30th, when it wasn't even drafted out until the 31st?
I called back, and she got a little snippy with me saying, "Ok, you need to talk to a General Manager."
Really? I had no idea.
Well, Melissa wasn't there. Ah! Melissa! She was at the other local hotel, so I was transferred and spoke with a girl named *Julie*, who transferred me straight to voicemail. So I went through the entire process of calling the first hotel again and being transferred to Julie. When I told her that she just transferred me and it went straight to voicemail, she said, "Ok. This is the first time I've picked up the phone, but I will transfer you again."
Don't EVEN get me started on your phone tact and customer service. DO NOT call me a LIAR when you are stealing money out of my bank account.
The phone rang and rang and Julie picked back up to tell me the manager was in a conference call. "Would you like to leave a message?"
Melissa is apparently a deep voiced man.
Anyway, I left a snotty voicemail, and never received a call back. So, I called again four hours later and spoke with deep voice.
When Derick paid for the hotel rooms back in June, he used his card but put it under his SPC's name. For my fellow civilian friends, SPC= BOSS. According to male Melissa, Derick's SPC visited Williamsburg, perhaps Busch Gardens?, this weekend and just booked a room on his already-set-up account, which automatically charged it to our card.
This doesn't make sense because practically in one breath, the guy told me that in order for a card to be charged by them the card actually has to be swiped. The he went on to say that the card was charged because they just charged the card on the rewards account. Doesn't it seem suspicious that the two names don't match?
And anyway, with all the ridiculous things we've been told and the excuses that have been made and the dead ends we've come upon, that may not have been the case at all. If it is the case, it's in no way the SPC's fault. It's 100% Springhill Suites fault because that is a sloppy way of running their system and their business, but what do I know about business? I studied English.
I really wanted to end the post there. With that dramatic, slightly snide remark that, in a way, toots my own horn and draws you, the reader, back to an earlier made point. I learned how to do that in English class, go figure.
BUT
I have a kind heart. Deep down under my backwoods country no-nonsense attitude that I tend to address toward ridiculous people and their ridiculous actions, I have a really sweet soul that can't end a blog post with hate.
I don't hate Marriot or Springhill Suites or Julie or deep voice Melissa. I just hate being treated like a fool. I hate when people think it's more important to update a Facebook page than help a customer. I hate when my husband and I are being transferred and hung up on and talked to like we are in the wrong when we are not.
I will not stay at that nice hotel that I have never had to read a rating about because I know it's good quality. It may be good quality, but I have received better customer service at McDonald's. Sorry, McDonald's, you always seem to get attacked. (BTW, we have yet to have our money refunded.) What if we needed to pay a bill? What if we overdrafted because of their mistake?
Anyway, through all of this nonsense, I have learned a valuable lesson. If someone needs help, help them. Don't throw something off onto someone else, because that someone else could very likely be a moron who, in Arkansas, "doesn't know their butt from a hole in the ground." If you are equipped with the means and abilities to be helpful, offer your hand and lead them along the way. Don't transfer the call, don't update your Facebook page, and sure as heck, don't hang up on them. Talk to people with respect and tact because you never know who that person is. You may need that person in the future, and what if they strongly believe in eye for an eye? Luckily, Julie in Williamsburg, in this household, we don't believe in that.
Also, once upon a time at the Raggedy Ann Day Care in Bay, Arkansas, my peers and I learned a little side note that could come in handy for big professional corporations like Marriot. If you take something that doesn't belong to you, give it back to its rightful owner.
Derick just got home and hopped right back on the phone with the hotel. He's so calm, polite, forgiving, understanding, patient. He's everything I'm not. But sometimes, in really crazy moments like today, when you're at the very bottom of a giant pool of poop and you're not getting anywhere with anyone, sometimes, a little tongue-lashing attitude goes a long way....or maybe not so much. But leaving that nasty voicemail made me feel better! And so did writing this blog.
Now y'all go out there and be helpful! And choose Holiday Inn;)
Derick uses a hot pink toothbrush!
We got a new set of toothbrushes this weekend. (We always buy the two-pack, isn't that cute?) I had opened the pack and put the toothbrushes in their holder and returned later to brush my teeth. Not thinking, I grabbed the lime green one because the toothbrush I had just thrown away was green. I realized this and told Derick, "you have to use the pink one!"
"Uhh. No I don't," He said.
Yes he does.
The reason we bought new toothbrushes, other than we just needed them, was because, last week, we went to Wilmington to eat at Flaming Amy's Burrito Barn. (Try it!) Unthinking, I ordered the Flaming Amy, only to find out it was the hottest thing ever! It was filled with all sorts of peppers and a special Flaming hot sauce. I could only finish half of it because it was so hot!
Later that night, I noticed a small bump on my gums and slightly remembered stabbing myself with a chip at the restaurant. I guess the spiciness caused a reaction because the next day, that area of my gums was swollen and hurting really bad. It hurt every time I brushed, and I assumed it was somewhat infected, so I decided I needed a new brush.
Derick and I have shared toothbrushes before, and there was a time when we were, not so much poor as just too busy to buy another one, so we'd just use the same one for a bit. But this time, even though I only used the lime green brush once, I didn't want to share my Flaming Amy gum infection with him.
So Derick uses a hot pink toothbrush.
[Here's Flaming Amy's Burrito Barn site: http://flamingamysburritobarn.com
Across town, there is Flaming Amy's Bowl. We haven't been there, but I'm assuming you order a bowl of similar burrito fillings.]
Oh! I signed up for a LINKS class for this week. For those of you who don't know, LINKS is sort of an orientation for people who are new to the Marine Corps. I went to a LINKS session in Quantico, but they suggested to go to a new one every time you PCS to a new duty station. I'm hoping to meet some friends there! Plus, this base is so huge and, unlike in Quantico, I haven't been able to drive around it myself yet, so I bet they can offer good information on what's where. I think it's super beneficial to attend a LINKS session--even if you know everything about the Marine Corps.
Today I am "supposed" to be cleaning the house. I want to post some pics on Facebook, since we've lived here for a month, and I know my family has been patiently waiting to see it! Our new bedroom furniture was delivered and set up on Friday. It looks so nice! We have a ton of storage space now! My goal is to have pictures up either today or tomorrow.
Paris has a hard time jumping up on the bed. She will jump up as high as she can, peep over the side of the bed while she's airborne, and whimper. She's discovered if she does that enough, we will help her up. It makes me nervous when she jumps off, though. The bed is so high that when she jumps down, the momentum sends her running forward! I am trying to convince Derick that she needs one of those little staircases to put by the bed. I know he thinks buying that for her makes it seem like she's the princess and that is her golden staircase to her royal throne, or something like that. But she is the princess, right?! Jumping off things like that can cause hip/back problems, especially in little dogs.
I know a lot of you are thinking it's stupid to let the dog sleep on our bed anyway. That's my fault. When we first got Paris, she was a teeny tiny itsy bitsy baby girl. Just a small puff of fur. We bought her a little kennel and put it out in the hallway. On her first night, we put her in the kennel and went to bed. Minutes later, she was whimpering and crying and scratching at the door. I couldn't sleep while she was doing that! So I thought maybe if we made a pallet in the floor, just for her first night, she would see us and know she wasn't alone.
We tried that and she cried more and more. So, I thought maybe we could just let her sleep on the pallet with us, just for one night. So we got her out of her little crate and put her at our feet in the pallet.
The floor was uncomfortable and our hallway was small, so we figured we might as well just get into the bed. So we put tiny Paris at the foot of the bed, where she slept soundly, completely content.
We woke up the next morning with her right between us.
She still sleeps on the foot of our bed, and once every few weeks we will wake up with her right beside us. It doesn't bother us, and I honestly don't really want her prowling around the house all night. If my parents were here, she'd be at the foot of their bed, hands down. She is a Momo and Popo's girl. They win over us every time.
When we lived with my parents, Mom would come tuck Paris in with us every night. After she was certain we were asleep, she would sneak into my parents' room and jump/whimper at their bed like she does here. Their bed is extremely high, so there was no way for her to get up without help. If she was really really lucky, my mom would pick her up and let her sleep in their bed. But usually, Mom would have to carry her back to our room and shut her in.
Poor Paris. She never gets her way.
Well, I hope everyone has a nice week! I will try to put house pictures up soon!
